Jim Maijala's Phunk Phiction -- A Phantasy Phunk Philm (music video, by Bill Parrette)


From: "William A. Parrette" Date: Thu, 20 Jun 2002 01:57:41 -0400 (EDT) Subject: My GFR Fantasy Video -- #2

We fade into a scene reminiscent of the frat party at the end of PCU (Movie: Politically Correct University, 1994, David Spade) -- maybe even the actual clip (considering today's video technology). George Clinton with Parliament/Funkadelic is playing at one end of a large hall as the party crowd is dancing and getting into the music:

We want the funk, Give up the funk, We need the funk, We gotta have that funk. We want the funk, Give up the funk, We need the funk, We gotta have that funk.

The scene switches to an outdoors shot as the five guys in Grand Funk Railroad are walking along occasionally talking among themselves. As the strands of music fade up to audibility among the quintet, Don stops suddenly, raising his arms to hold the rest of the band of musicians back -- they all stumble a bit, bumping into one another. Mel, right behind Don, recovers first and starts:

Hey! What the ...

Don raises one finger to his lips and says:

Shhhhhh ... listen!

The sounds of the Parliament/Funkadelic start becoming audible to all of them. As the four guys start mumbling among themselves about someone "wanting the funk," Don points and says:

It's coming from over there.

The band switches course and heads toward the source of the music. At the door, the kid "taking tickets" is shuffling a wad of money in his hand and, without looking up, says sort of mechanically:

Five bucks each ...

As he looks up, the astonished look on his face tells of his instant recognition of the members of Grand Funk Railroad. He stammers:

Grand Fun ... Grand F ... GFR ...

He starts looking in at the funk-filled room and back at Grand Funk stammering some unknown words. Mel, Max, Bruce, and Tim follow Don into the room handing the poor guy a five-spot as he starts loosing control of the money -- letting much of it drop to the floor.

An overhead shot shows the five guys approaching the stage as the crowd splits almost like the "Red Sea" parted for Moses -- many of them recognizing the members of Grand Funk Railroad.

As we fade into another angle, we see Parliament Funkadelic still playing, as Don steps up to the stage, arms crossed, right in front of a somewhat surprised George Clinton.

George signals to the rest of the band and the song ends with a sharp, staccato series of chords that sound as if it were to end exactly that way. George talks to Don:

Don, m'brother, long time no see. What can I do for you and the American Band.

Don replies with:

We heard that you "wanted the Funk," that you "gotta have the Funk." So we brought the Funk to you. Grand Funk.

As he turns his head to look at Mel, Bruce, Max, and Tim, they are mumbling back and forth -- shaking their heads in agreement. George replies:

Wait a minute, friend. Are you telling me that Grand Funk is funkier than Funkadelic?

George Clinton sweeps his arm behind him indicating the band. In agreement, Don, Mel, Bruce, Tim, and Max stare ahead shaking their heads yes. George starts:

Well, I'll be ...

Mel chimes in:

If I had my bass here ...

Bruce pops up and starts:

And, I had my guitar ...

Max and Tim start to lend their agreement as Don says:

And, if I had a good set of Peavys ...

George signals behind himself:

Sir Lollipop Man, step up here for a minute.

As one of the Parliament/Funkadelic crew steps up beside George, Max can be heard in whispered tones:

Holy cow! No wonder they call him the "Long-haired Sucka!"

George Clinton:

Sir Lollipop Man, contact the mothership. We need some gear.

The Long-haired Sucka appears to go into a trance for a moment, looks at George and nods in the affirmative, clasps his hand looking like he was passing something off to him. Without a word, George points to stage left just a few feet from where he is standing. As a ray of light appears to be coming out of his outstretched index finger, something starts appearing as if it were coming out of a cloud. A large collective gasp comes from the dance floor. Within seconds a complete set of music gear appears on the stage right next to Parliament/Funkadelic's setup.

A noticeable "Wow ..." comes out of both Bruce and Tim as they head over to their instruments and start checking them out. As all of the guys start heading in the same direction, the P-Funk singers can be heard singing very low:

Make my funk the Grand Funk, I want my Funk uncut. Make my funk the Grand Funk, I wants to get Funked up! I want the bomb, I want the Grand Funk, I want my Funk uncut. Make my funk the Grand Funk, I wants to get Funked up!

As the chorus continues, the guys of Grand Funk Railroad walk over to the instruments and start checking things out. Much to their amazement, all of the "gear" is the same or better quality as that they use on the road.

The singers are continuing, and they start singing louder and louder. Instinctively, from behind the drums, Don looks straight into George's eyes as George returns the stare. George gives Don a little nod, and Don counts off:

1, 2, 3, 4!

And as the crowd of dancers start to go ballistic, as the beer-drinkers start screaming "Yeah" and either raise their fists in the air or start playing air-guitar, both bands play a few more choruses in perfect synchronization to a quick and complicated ending of several different chords to a flat cymbal smack by both drummers.

After a second of silence, again, the audience of dancers and such go absolutely crazy -- going nuts.

Suddenly, Bruce starts playing some familiar chords. Don looks at Bruce and smiles, looks over at George who is groovin' to the chords already and is playing along with Bruce. Mel kicks in with his sometime unnerving style of "buffalo-fart" bass lines. Max walks up to the microphone with George Clinton ready to sing. Don yells over at the P-Funk side of the stage and says:

Hey, Sucka'! Mr. Lollipop Man. Do you know the Limousine Driver?

The intro starts to fade, Don gives he signal, the P-Funk horns come in strong, and Max starts singing with George Clinton:

Hey, Mr. Limousine Driver, can I ask you a favor, please? Let her in my door and don't look back here no more. I know you can do it with ease.

Both bands kick into the song. Both bands start playing a slightly funkier style, and he audience is full of even more dancers as the word is out on campus that history is being made in fraternity-row with two famous, different, yet complimentary bands have joined forces for just one incredible night at one of the frat houses.

After a couple more songs, Mr. Lollipop Man steps up front and says:

Take me to the Mothership.

And, in a Star Trek-like fashion, he disappears as he is transported out of the room. As each P-Funk member continues in a similar fashion, Don grabs the moment and starts, the now famous, drum intro ...

Out on the road for forty days. Last night in Little Rock put me in a haze. ...

Don looks over to where Parliament/Funkadelic used to be. George is the last one to leave. They exchange knowing glances, Don smiles, George gives a quick wink and smiles pointing to something behind them. As George starts dissolving in the transporter sparkle, Don looks back over his shoulder and -- from out of nowhere -- a huge American flag drops down as a backdrop.

The dancers and others go ballistic again. And as we start to fade, Don looks at each of the members of the American Band and then the shot focus on Don alone. He smiles a big smile, gives a little nod of the head, as the scene fades to black completely as We're An American Band hits its end notes.


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